What Every Great Parent Has in Common

Every great parent has this one thing in common.

I learned this in the most unusual of circumstances.

While I was vacationing in Singapore, I was hanging out at the pool watching my friend (who is a dad) play with his kids in the pool. He was involved, present, and full of love. I admired him as a father and learn a lot from him.

As I was watching him, the Holy Spirit interrupted me:

Phil, do you notice something?

What?

Did you notice that every great parent you admire is also a really healthy person?

Then it hit me–He’s right.

Every great parent I knew and admired was also a really healthy person. The Lord was teaching me that parenting is 100% overflow. All our habits, for good or worse, dictate the quality of our parenting.

Show me great children, and I will find for you a healthy person rearing them.

Anxious, angry, bitter, unforgiving, selfish parents trickle their brokenness down to their children and in the way they parent. Conversely, healthy, forgiving, communicative, emotionally aware, Spirit-led parents trickle their light to their children as well.

And so the literal meaning of what Jesus said is true: “wisdom is proved right by all her children” (Luke 7:35)

If you want to raise great children, be a great parent. If you want to be a great parent, be a great person, governed and chiseled by the hand of God.


Lord, I want to be the best parents my kids could have asked for. I know in order for that to happen, I need to be made more like you. Remove from us all that isn’t like you, so that when our children look at us, they see your face. Amen

Author avatar
Phil Chan
Phil has been writing for over 15 years. His passion is to help people see God and to live a life that matters.

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