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Every great parent has this one thing in common.

I learned this in the most unusual of circumstances.

While I was vacationing in Singapore, I was hanging out at the pool watching my friend (who is a dad) play with his kids in the pool. He was involved, present, and full of love. I admired him as a father and learn a lot from him.

As I was watching him, the Holy Spirit interrupted me:

Phil, do you notice something?

What?

Did you notice that every great parent you admire is also a really healthy person?

Then it hit me–He’s right.

Every great parent I knew and admired was also a really healthy person. The Lord was teaching me that parenting is 100% overflow. All our habits, for good or worse, dictate the quality of our parenting.

Show me great children, and I will find for you a healthy person rearing them.

Anxious, angry, bitter, unforgiving, selfish parents trickle their brokenness down to their children and in the way they parent. Conversely, healthy, forgiving, communicative, emotionally aware, Spirit-led parents trickle their light to their children as well.

And so the literal meaning of what Jesus said is true: “wisdom is proved right by all her children” (Luke 7:35)

If you want to raise great children, be a great parent. If you want to be a great parent, be a great person, governed and chiseled by the hand of God.


Lord, I want to be the best parents my kids could have asked for. I know in order for that to happen, I need to be made more like you. Remove from us all that isn’t like you, so that when our children look at us, they see your face. Amen

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